The finale of GTA Army, with some very special guests….
PLAYER: I’m not being a private! I’ll try the sergeant in his last year.
VOICEOVER: Sergeant in last year. You may select the sergeant’s outfit.
PLAYER: I can change his clothes?
VOICEOVER: Activewear. A priest’s running wear. Satin jacket.* Satin jacket and pants. Nudity.
PLAYER: Agh! (and something not subtitled) Satin. It’s a good fit.
ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Fist
SERGEANT bullies other characters
PLAYER: As I suspected, with a sergeant you have total freedom.
ON SCREEN: Special guest Block B
VOICEOVER: New recruits have transferred in.
PLAYER: New recruits came?
SERGEANT hits recruits in stomach to make them speak
ZICO: Private Zico.
TAEIL: Private Taeil
PARK KYUNG: Private Park Kyung. (SERGEANT hits him again) Private Park- Private- Private Park Kyung.
P.O: Private P.O.
VOICOVER: Push the objects button to ride the private.
SERGEANT rides on ZICO’s back, ZICO dumps him.
PLAYER: That new X…. He bucked!
VOICEOVER: Catch him before he tells the executive officers.
SERGEANT is too late, ZICO hands note to officer.
Sergeant Kim Min-hyo makes me want to die.
MP: Take him to the stockade. Your military term has been extended, congrats.
ON SCREEN: Military term + 1 month.
PLAYER: Spare the body and just do a quick discharge!
ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Weed whacker
PLAYER: Ugh, backbreaking!
ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Shovel
PLAYER: Game store owner…. Aigh, really!
SERGEANT approaches recruits
PLAYER: These boys again–why are they assembled?
VOICOVER: You have come upon a division commander inspecting the troops.
DIVISION COMMANDER comes out of car
PLAYER: Wow! A two-star general came! Two stars!
VOICEOVER: Move the mountain.
PLAYER: What? The mountain?
ON SCREEN: Division commander (two stars)
PLAYER: The game store owner?! (he decks DIVISION COMMANDER)
VOICEOVER: An enlisted man has committed violence against a two-star general.
MP: Lunatic. The X is….
ON SCREEN: Dead.
* 깔깔이 means “georgette,” but because it’s used in Korean military clothing, it has these connotations of being tough outdoor gear that it doesn’t have in the U.S.
If you’d like read translated versions of the later GTA skits, they have been subtitled here by a fan of Hong Jin Ho, who took over as the game store owner in later skits. I would especially recommend GTA White Day. (And I should explain the one thing that translator doesn’t explain–Hong is rather infamous for poor diction.)