I can fix this!

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Adult content ahoy!

You know how the K-netz said they didn’t mind Sulli so much anymore now that they have Seolhyun to shit on for having a sex life? Well, apparently they have a lot of problems controlling their compulsions, because now they’re in a lather over this picture.

sulli-instagram

Is the problem that this picture of Sulli and Goo Hara sexy? Absolutely–I mean, no, of course not, netizens would never be that stupidly puritanical unless there are women involved.

No. The problem is that this picture is a “Lolita concept”! What is a “Lolita concept”? That’s what you say when you want to pretend that a picture of women in their 20s is child pornography.

How can netizens possibly look at this picture and see child pornography? Well, they’re VERY sensitiveThey are SO sensitive, in fact, that when they see two women huddling sexily in a shirt that says “Johnson’s baby oil” they think of babies–specifically of sex with babies–not, you know, of lube or anything vaguely normal like that.

Since the alternative is putting every butthurt Korean netizen on a sex-offender list–which might actually not be a bad idea, but it’s not something that I, personally, can do–I’m going to offer up some visual guides to help indicate what people who have not repressed their sexuality into something completely horrific and criminal might think of when they see this picture.

 ky

Lube

astro

Lube for buttsex

organic

Organic lube

evoo

Lube if you’re desperate and not worried about damaging a latex condom

pam

Lube if you’re desperate and not worried about damaging a latex condom, but the words “extra virgin” make you think about Things You Shouldn’t Think About

zogs

Not actually lube, but if you were a kid in the ’80s, you thought it was. NO DON’T THINK ABOUT KIDS!!!–JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

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3 responses »

  1. Pingback: It’s always interesting to watch this unfold | My Other Blog

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