Practicing to be what?

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Jackson, a man who can out-hop a kangaroo, could not out-hop some crazy “fans” and wound up injured in a car accident they caused.

His label is saying he wasn’t badly injured, and hopefully he’ll recover fully, but obviously these “fans” were massively out of line nonetheless.

Stuff like this really makes me wonder what people are hoping to accomplish with this kind of fan culture. I understand (no, I really understand–I have Chinese in-laws, and we’ve had this discussion) that in a lot of Asian cultures, parents don’t want their high-school age children to date.

Here in the States, we just kind of take if for granted that high-school kids will date, and that the quality of those relationships will probably be lousy–I remember thinking in high school that six months was an enormous length of time for a relationship to endure. But the idea is that, with time, you’ll learn from these crummy relationships (and dear God please you won’t get pregnant please don’t get pregnant please). Then you will be better prepared to have a lasting relationship when you’re older.

In many Asian cultures, though, the mentality seems to be that you should skip these crappy dating years–kids that age aren’t mature enough to have good relationships anyway–and wait until you’re of college age. At least. (Let’s face it–parents the world over would just be a lot more comfortable if their kids didn’t date until they were 30 or 35.)

The problem, of course, is that from about middle school on, kids are awash in hormones! They want to date, and they want to date really badly! So, if your kid is a girl, you aim her at the K-Pop idols and hope to God she gets so fixated on one she loses all interest in the pregnancy-inducing boys around her. Once she picks a bias, she can moon over him and get him pressies on his birthday and worry about his health and career, just like she would a real-life boyfriend or husband!

It’s not just an outlet–it’s training. It’s just like the crap relationships kids have in high-school in the States, except with a greatly-reduced chance that the girl’s parents will become grandparents in their 30s or 40s!

Where it all starts to fall apart from my point of view is when these girls start engaging in the more controlling and delusional behavior, which are often encouraged by labels who push this fantasy in hopes of extracting more money from the fan base. When that happens, these girls are not training to become any decent sort of girlfriend or spouse: They’re training to become harassers, or batterers, or johns.

I mean, chasing peopleHoney–if you have to chase him, he ain’t interested.

And in spite of what some other movies tell you, I can’t think of a less-effective tactic to win someone’s heart than stalking them. There has been one point in my life where I did some serious homework into the legality of shooting someone (short answer: Handle it another way). Guess what kind of swain inspired this research?

Although I guess I can think of a less-effective tactic: Writing letters using menstrual blood. Boy howdy–that is the K-Pop fan tactic that screams, I have absolutely zero experience with men! isn’t it? I don’t pretend to be a master seductress, but if you want a guy to think of you in a romantic way, drawing attention to your menstrual period is not the way to do it, OK?

Which I guess is all a long way of saying, Where the fuck are these kids’ parents?

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