Category Archives: SNL GTA Army translation

The sergeant hits a block!

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The finale of GTA Army, with some very special guests….

 

PLAYER: I’m not being a private! I’ll try the sergeant in his last year.

VOICEOVER: Sergeant in last year. You may select the sergeant’s outfit.

PLAYER: I can change his clothes?

VOICEOVER: Activewear. A priest’s running wear. Satin jacket.* Satin jacket and pants. Nudity.

PLAYER: Agh! (and something not subtitled) Satin. It’s a good fit.

ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Fist

SERGEANT bullies other characters

PLAYER: As I suspected, with a sergeant you have total freedom.

ON SCREEN: Special guest Block B

VOICEOVER: New recruits have transferred in.

PLAYER: New recruits came?

SERGEANT hits recruits in stomach to make them speak

ZICO: Private Zico.

TAEIL: Private Taeil

PARK KYUNG: Private Park Kyung. (SERGEANT hits him again) Private Park- Private- Private Park Kyung.

P.O: Private P.O.

VOICOVER: Push the objects button to ride the private.

SERGEANT rides on ZICO’s back, ZICO dumps him.

PLAYER: That new X…. He bucked!

VOICEOVER: Catch him before he tells the executive officers.

SERGEANT is too late, ZICO hands note to officer.

NOTE: GRIEVANCE

Sergeant Kim Min-hyo makes me want to die.

MP: Take him to the stockade. Your military term has been extended, congrats.

VOICEOVER: Stockade.

ON SCREEN: Military term + 1 month.

PLAYER: Spare the body and just do a quick discharge!

VOICEOVER: Weed.

ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Weed whacker

PLAYER: Ugh, backbreaking!

VOICEOVER: Dig.

ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Shovel

PLAYER: Game store owner…. Aigh, really!

SERGEANT approaches recruits

PLAYER: These boys again–why are they assembled?

VOICOVER: You have come upon a division commander inspecting the troops.

DIVISION COMMANDER comes out of car

PLAYER: Wow! A two-star general came! Two stars!

VOICEOVER: Move the mountain.

PLAYER: What? The mountain?

ON SCREEN: Division commander (two stars)

PLAYER: The game store owner?! (he decks DIVISION COMMANDER)

VOICEOVER: An enlisted man has committed violence against a two-star general.

MP: Lunatic. The X is….

ON SCREEN: Dead.

GAME OVER

 

* 깔깔이 means “georgette,” but because it’s used in Korean military clothing, it has these connotations of being tough outdoor gear that it doesn’t have in the U.S.

 

If you’d like read translated versions of the later GTA skits, they have been subtitled here by a fan of Hong Jin Ho, who took over as the game store owner in later skits. I would especially recommend GTA White Day. (And I should explain the one thing that translator doesn’t explain–Hong is rather infamous for poor diction.)

The vital casing

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PLAYER: Ah, failed, failed. Let’s start again.

ON SCREEN: Private

PLAYER: I’ll do better this time.

ON SCREEN (under weapons available): K-2 rifle

VOICEOVER: Hit the target 10 times to win a leave pass. Use the L-stick to aim at the target.

PLAYER: (hits target once) Yes! (hits target more) Oh yeah! (empties clip into target)

VOICEOVER: Bullseye.*

PLAYER: Yes! I win the leave!

MP: Take him to military retraining.

PLAYER: I did everything right! Why did the MPs appear?

VOICEOVER: You have lost one casing.

PLAYER: Why does a casing matter?

VOICEOVER: You have been entered into military retraining.

PLAYER performs punishments

PLAYER: What jerk made such an exhausting game?

 

* 만발 literally means “full bloom.”

It’s all in the rhythm

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VOICEOVER: If you want to march in the correct military form, move the L stick and R stick alternately.

PLAYER: Ugh, this is confusing!

HIGH-RANKING OFFICER: Hey! (gestures PRIVATE to come over)

VOICEOVER: Using the controller, follow the cadence of the high-ranking officer.

HIGH-RANKING OFFICER: Hey! Hey!

PLAYER: I’m supposed to match his timing! (this part is not fully subtitled, so I could not catch it all–he’s messing with the controls) Square! Square!

Buzzer sounds

VOICEOVER: You have failed.

HIGH-RANKING OFFICER: Stretch out on the floor.

PLAYER: That game store owner!

VOICEOVER: Again, use the controls to follow the commander.

Once again, they don’t really subtitle this part–I presume it’s mostly of the “Attention!” and “Hup one! Hup two!” variety.

VOICEOVER: You have failed.

HIGH-RANKING OFFICER: Stretch out on the floor.

PLAYER: Ah, how can you tell me to do that! It’s really annoying!

HIGH-RANKING OFFICER: Str- (PRIVATE decks him)

VOICEOVER: You have committed mutiny.

PLAYER: No! (and something else that isn’t subtitled)

MP: Take him to the stockade.

VOICEOVER: Escape the soldiers.

PLAYER: That way! Military vehicles! Military vehicles! (PRIVATE gets into vehicle)

ON SCREEN: Retona.*

PLAYER: Why won’t it go?

VOICEOVER: You cannot drive without a driving companion.**

PLAYER: You can’t drive alone in the army?

PRIVATE is captured.

MP: Your military term has been extended.

VOICEOVER: Stockade.

ON SCREEN: Military term + 7 days

 

* A Jeep-like vehicle made by Kia

** A real regulation, apparently! As is common in the United States when people are learning how to drive, in Korea under certain circumstances a driver must have a companion in the car with them for safety.

The army game is hard!

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ON SCREEN: Grand Theft Autumn Army. To begin, push start button.

PLAYER: I can’t stop dancing to this song!

ON SCREEN: Game voiceover by Seo Yuri.

VOICEOVER: Choose your character. Private. Sergeant in last year.* USO soldier.**

PLAYER: USO soldier! That sure sounds cushy!

VOICEOVER: The USO soldier has been abolished.

PLAYER: If it was abolished, why include it? Here’s a cunning trick: Instead of being a faithful army guy, I’ll try being a newbie.

VOICEOVER: Private.

ON SCREEN (under weapons available): Fist.

VOICEOVER: Use the L stick to control the private’s movements.

PRIVATE roams around the barracks

SERGEANT: Stretch out on the ground.***

VOICEOVER: Privates are not allowed to wander about.

SERGEANT: Stretch out on the ground.

PLAYER: This game won’t allow you to do that?

SERGEANT: Stretch out on the ground.

VOICEOVER: Please stretch out on the ground.

PLAYER: How am I supposed to do that?

VOICEOVER: The installed camera will understand your movements.

PLAYER: I have to do all this…. (does punishment pose) The army game is hard!

 

* Korean men must serve two-year stints in the military, typically going from privates to sergeants. Soldiers at the end of their term are notorious for getting extremely sloppy about their uniforms.

** The exact translation is “entertainment soldier.” This was a unit in the Korean military for celebrities–the idea was that they would promote the military and boost troop morale, but Se7en’s hand-job scandal put an end to it.

*** An order to take the postures Korean soldiers are expected to take as punishment for minor infractions–akin to “Drop and give me 20.”

GTA Army!

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On to the next GTA skit–GTA Army!

7ontheblock translated the Block B portions here. I watched that when it first came out (in fact, that’s how I discovered the GTA skits), but I’m going to try to translate all of this on my own, without reference to that translation, because that’s how we learn.

Hup one!

 

PLAYER walks into game store.

STORE OWNER: Welcome!

PLAYER punches STORE OWNER

STORE OWNER: What did you do that for?

PLAYER throws GTA Gangnam onto the counter.

PLAYER: This was no fun, so that’s what you get!

STORE OWNER: GTA Gangnam wasn’t fun.

PLAYER: You don’t have any good games. You’re no help.

PLAYER starts to leave. STORE OWNER grabs him.

STORE OWNER: Just a minute? What kind of game sounds fun? An army game?

PLAYER. No. Why?

STORE OWNER: How about it? GTA… (pulls out game) Army! This game and the next will make daily life in the military so much easier!

PLAYER gives up and takes the game.

PLAYER: There’s never a break!

He starts to leave. STORE OWNER grabs him.

STORE OWNER: Just a minute!

PLAYER: You’re doing this again?

STORE OWNER: That game supports motion capture. Here! (pulls out camera) Take this with you!