Category Archives: SNL GTA Gangnam translation

The thrilling finale of GTA Gangnam!

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PLAYER: Let’s do it again.

ON SCREEN: Seolleung Station

VOICEOVER: Polish shoes part-time to earn money.

PLAYER: I’ll make some honest money.

VOICEOVER: To polish the shoes, carefully rotate the stick.

PLAYER rotates stick; PLAYER CHARACTER polishes a shoe

ON SCREEN: Pocket money  $5

PLAYER: This way, someday, I’ll have the money to buy a car.

Days pass in real life

ON SCREEN: Pocket money  $25

Pocket money  $150

Pocket money  $795

Pocket money  $1,195

TWO WEEKS LATER

PLAYER: That should be enough.

ON SCREEN: Pocket money  $100,000

PLAYER: Ah, an import car.

VOICEOVER: You’ve purchased an import car.

PLAYER: Bought it!

ON SCREEN: BMW Mini

Apgujeong-dong

PLAYER: I’ve become not normal.* Now, should I look for women?

BABE appears.

PLAYER: The babe who XX hit me!

BABE smiles and runs into car.

VOICEOVER: Bring the woman someplace quiet.

PLAYER: Let’s go to a wholesome motel.

ON SCREEN: Samseong-dong

PLAYER: The motel has valet parking! We’re still in Gangnam!

PLAYER CHARACTER hands keys to VALET

ON SCREEN: Gwak Han Gu (The real GTA)**

PLAYER: Gwak Han Gu! It can’t. . . . Not the keys!

VOICEOVER: Gwak Han Gu has been entrusted with the import car and will not give it back.

PLAYER: My import car has been stolen!

GAME OVER

 

* “Not normal” is said in English, but I’d assume this means something more along the lines of “I’m special now.”

** Gwak Han Gu is a Korean comedian who has been arrested multiple times for stealing luxury cars.

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Cruising for babes

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Back to GTA Gangnam! We’re starting at the 3:15 mark here.

 

PLAYER: But where do men go to pick up women?

ON SCREEN: TIKO [His crappy car]

Shinsa-dong.

VOICEOVER: To tempt the opposite sex, push the L3 button.

PLAYER: Try to pick up a babe?

PLAYER CHARACTER stops car, honks at BABE and waves her over. She gives him the finger.

PLAYER: That bitch!

BABE walks off.

PLAYER: In Gangnam, you have to drive an import car.

ON SCREEN: Quest

VOICEOVER: Extort money from a female con artist* in Gangnam. If you succeed, you will receive $50,000.

PLAYER: Fifty. . . . Fifty thousand dollars? I’ll have enough money to buy an import car!

ON SCREEN: Apgujeong Station, 4th exit

PLAYER CHARACTER stops woman.

PLAYER: This one?

PLAYER CHARACTER stops another woman.

PLAYER: Oh, why do they all look the same?

PLAYER CHARACTER is surrounded by four identical women.

PLAYER: Hey, you’re scaring me! Get away! Get away!

PLAYER CHARACTER decks all four women.

POLICE OFFICER: Look what that guy just did!

PLAYER: [Says something that was not subtitled. Sorry!]

POLICE OFFICER (putting handcuffs on PLAYER CHARACTER): Clicketty-click!

ON SCREEN:

Pocket money     $0

Bail     $50,000

Remaining pocket money     -$50,000

BANKRUPTCY

VOICEOVER: You are bankrupt.

PLAYER: I want to kill that store owner!

 

* 꽃뱀 literally means “flower snake”

Meeting Jay Park

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PLAYER: Why can’t I even steal a car? Again–play again.

ON SCREEN: Yeoksam-dong

Quest

VOICEOVER: Go to a club to enjoy some entertainment.

PLAYER: Gangnam also has low dogs. (PLAYER CHARACTER enters club) Ooh, the water’s fine.*

VOICEOVER: Would you like to go to a private room?

PLAYER: Private room. . . ?

PLAYER CHARACTER enters private room, followed by JAY PARK in stripper gear!

PLAYER: Oh, a man came in!

VOICEOVER: You can press the objects button to change the angle.

PLAYER presses button, sees close up of JAY PARK’s dancing nipples.

PLAYER: Ah! Dirty!

PLAYER CHARACTER leaves club

ON SCREEN:

Pocket money: $50

Host bar: $50

Remaining pocket money: $0

PLAYER: Strip clubs are not host bars!

 

* There’s some wordplay going on here: 하류 means lower class, but it also means downstream.

Life as a tout

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Back to the translation!

 

ON SCREEN: (under fist–this indicates weapons available) Fist (above GTA Gangnam logo) Apgujeong Rodeo Drive

VOICEOVER: Move your car.

PLAYER (as PLAYER CHARACTER walks up to car): Tiko?* (PLAYER CHARACTER gets into car and drives off) This is a minicar!

ON SCREEN: Cheongdam-dong

VOICEOVER: At the salon, a number of different hairstyles are available.

PLAYER: You can look at different hairstyles?

VOICEOVER: Click to choose your hairstyle. Like an orange. Rocker. Sandara Park. Student studying abroad.**

PLAYER: Now Gangnam has given me hair like that of a student studying abroad.

ON SCREEN:

Pocket money     $50

Haircut     $30

Remaining pocket money     $20

PLAYER: Gangnam salons are too much!

ON SCREEN: Apgujeon Rodeo Drive

Quest

VOICEOVER: Today is flaming Friday.

ON SCREEN: (PLAYER CHARACTER looks at card in hand)

BOS NIGHTCLUB

Bottle service

Panchinko

(photo of Kim Minkyo, the actor in this skit)

MIN KYO

Psy: 010-4650-XXXX

VOICEOVER: Scatter promotional cards.

(PLAYER CHARACTER scatters cards, runs into car)

VOICEOVER: You have damaged a fancy import car.

LADY DRIVER: You XX!

PLAYER: What’s with this lady?

(PLAYER CHARACTER decks LADY DRIVER and steals her car)

PLAYER: Oh! It’s mine! Oh!

POLICE OFFICER: Car thief.

PLAYER: Oh! A police officer! A police officer! Get away!

VOICEOVER: Gangnam’s rush-hour traffic is at a complete standstill.

PLAYER: Such pointless realism!

POLICE OFFICER (putting handcuffs on PLAYER CHARACTER): Clicketty-click!

ON SCREEN:

Pocket money     $20

Bail     $50,000

Remaining pocket money     -$49,980

BANKRUPTCY

VOICEOVER: You are bankrupt.

 

* The Daewoo Tiko–a very cheap, very small car.

** On the screen, all these styles are followed by the word “hair.”

Picking a character

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Not much today because I’m busy and the next scene is pretty long.

SHOP OWNER’s ominous laughter echoes as PLAYER, now at home, loads GTA Gangnam

ON SCREEN: Grand Theft Autumn Gagnam

To start, press start button

PLAYER (starting game): Oh, wow, this is Apgujeong, isn’t it? This is really awesome!

ON SCREEN: Game voiceover by Seo Yuri

VOICEOVER: Choose your character. Nightclub tout.* Valet parking attendant. Psy.

PLAYER: Psy? I’ll try Psy.

VOICEOVER: Because he is busy with overseas activities, Psy is not available. (Psy dances off.)

PLAYER: If he’s not around, then why did you include him? Well, then, tout.

* The word for “tout” is censored on the screen (“삐X” instead of “삐끼”), although not bleeped. I’m assuming this is because touts often pass out flyers for unsavory things, such as prostitution.

Gangnam Style!

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OK, so I am on to my next translation: The SNL Korea skit GTA Gangnam!

This is actually the third GTA skit; if you want to see the first two with English subtitles, they are here. They are fairly raunchy, as is this one, so be warned. If you can’t be bothered to watch them, the important thing for this skit is that this guy (I’m going to call him PLAYER) keeps going into a game shop, where the SHOP OWNER keeps taking him into a dark room and giving him secret editions of Grand Theft Auto (called Grand Theft Autumn so that no one gets sued). In the first skit, the game was set in the Joseon era; the second was set during Japan’s World War II occupation of Korea.

Here’s the video for the third skit:

I’m going to translate about a minute at a time, like I did before, because that’s actually a lot of work for me, and if I save it all up for one long post, I’ll forget stuff.

 

PLAYER enters game shop, throws Resident Evil onto counter.

PLAYER: I finished it. You call this a game?

SHOP OWNER: Resident Evil is a masterpiece of masterpieces.

PLAYER: Ugh, you never give me anything decent to play.*

SHOP OWNER: What’s good lately is GTA.

PLAYER: GTA again. . . .

SHOP OWNER: Come with me!

PLAYER (grabs SHOP OWNER’s arm): What, I’m supposed to follow you wherever like a baby to where you’ve got GTA Gojoseon or something like that?

SHOP OWNER (laughs ominously): This time the setting is modern. Psy’s number-one top hit “Gangnam Style.” (the song starts to play) The whole world is focused on Gangnam. A quickie release: GTA Gangnam!

PLAYER: GTA Gangnam?

SHOP OWNER: If you don’t have fun with this one, you can smack me good!

PLAYER: Oh! I trust you.

 

*Boy, I hope that’s right–for whatever reason, this line was really hard to translate!